Narcissists are energy vampires in the truest sense of the word. They suck the life out of others to fill the inadequacies they feel within themselves. Once you have been able to distance yourself from the narcissist in your life, pay attention to how you feel and their vibe.
Oftentimes, people are unaware that their energy is being slowly siphoned away. This is especially true if you live in the same environment as the narcissist. I was with a narcissist for decades and constantly felt ill. Before I left, I was on 25 prescription drugs and supplements in addition to seeking medical treatments for my lymphatic system out of state. At one point, I did not have the strength to walk to my front door and my doctor suggested disability. Within about a year after leaving, I went down to 10 prescription drugs and supplements and did not need a single out of state treatment. This is true in light of the withdrawl of the trauma bond- which caused 4 -7 weeks of diahrrea, hair loss, panica attacks, and flashbacks- and being terrorized by the narrcissit on a dialy basis.Thus, I was not in optimal health all the time. Nevertheless, a significant, measurable increase in my health occured. It is true that I had chronic Lyme Disease. However, medical experts have stated that my body should have been able to manage better and the chronic fatigue that left me bed or couch ridden often over decades should not have occurred. I even instituted a No Activity Sunday rule in which I skipped holidays, birthdays, and kids’ activities because I had to make sure I had a day of rest to make it through the work week. I do not live that life any more. Ask yourself, do you have chronic health issues? Perhaps the health issues are related to chronic inflammation because you are in a constant state of fight-flight-or freeze and another person is literally sucking your life force. Think about it for a moment.
Once you have been away from the narcissist, and look closely, you can tell when they have ‘fed”. There is a shininess to them. Similarly, you can tell when they haven’t because there is a darkness to the person. I noticed this over time when I had to co-parent and observed this individual from a fresh, detached perspective. There are many ways a narcissist “feeds’ off of your energy. They can be a rescuer or oftentimes do so through sex. If you are unsure, sit within yourself for a moment. Be reflective about interactions and how the narcissist seems. Through observation and time, you will start to notice these things as well. It is important that you are no longer “food”. The conversations with the narcissist should be short and to the point with no emotion; many of the research articles call this gray rock. Do not allow yourself to be “food” and model this behavior for your children and other individuals that are in your life. Once a narcissist realizes you are no longer “food” they will move on and find someone to replace you. This may seem very painful at first. Just remember, you are the lucky one. Quite literally, you are longer “food” and-if you live from the inside out-will find that being your own source of love, attention, fun, and security will lead to a life you never knew existed. You can do it! I believe in you!
Comments